Sunday, October 21, 2007

Dad's Birthday

Today would have been my father's 85th birthday, but we lost him in 1982 to lung cancer. I always think of him every October 21st, though. I can't say we were terribly close, because Dad had a horrible temper. It made it difficult to get close to him. A recovering alcoholic, he had a temper that you might expect out of a "mean drunk."

This isn't to say I didn't love my father, because I did. He was a country-and-western musician, a guitar player, who wrote beautiful songs and who played onstage with the likes of the young Johnny Cash in his day. Because he had a family to feed, though, he gradually gave up his music, all except for the one guitar he had and that he would take out to play for us when he was in the mood. I miss that about my father. I guess I grew up with a love of musicians and of music because of him. My mother gave me a love of reading. I miss them both, but today is Dad's day. I hope he is having a good life somewhere in the universe.

What I'm reading right now:
  • A Thousand Names for Joy - Byron Katie
    • I love this woman's work. She became enlightened without evening knowing anything about Eastern philosophies. She just "woke up to reality" one morning after being clinically depressed, angry, and immobile. I'm enjoying this book which features her responding to passages from the Tao Te Ching, which her husband, Stephen Mitchell, once helped to translate. Her responses are genuine, innocent, and astute.
  • East of Eden - John Steinbeck
    • This is one of the Steinbeck books I never got around to reading, though I love Steinbeck. I'm nibbling at it right now, enjoying each morsel.
  • The Big Questions - Lama Surya Das
    • This is a book you can pick up and put down at leisure. It doesn't answer the big questions for you, rather it helps you to explore them more thoroughly.
In addition to all of this, I wrote one beautiful page today before the phone began to ring. I don't know why I'm not fond of talking on the phone, but I hate it. I have to really be in the mood to hang onto that receiver for any amount of time. I talked to my daughter twice today (she's still in the hospital), to my sister for about an hour, and just missed a call with my best friend. I didn't call her back, though, because I was feeling pretty crappy after breakfast, at which I ate only some French toast. I came home and slept for 2.5 hours. When I got up, my husband informed me that his mother would be here any minute. I love my mother-in-law, but I wasn't expecting anyone today. I tidied up the house a bit and then she was here. We went out to dinner and I managed to eat a salad and half a sandwich. I thought I was actually going to get away with eating, and then the pain hit about an hour later. So, oh well, I'll be calling the doctor tomorrow. Maybe that ultrasound is in order.

The beautiful page will keep. I know that I'll be able to continue with that stream of thought when I pick it up again. Meanwhile, yes, I owe some phone calls tomorrow. I wish there were a better way to keep in touch with the people I love. I really hate the phone! Telepathy, anyone?

Peace - D

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